Indeed, we face judgement from varying ages and by different groups, i.e. Charlesworth found that even children as young as three regularly evaluate adults for personality traits such as trustworthiness, authority and expertise by focusing on their facial features. People habitually make important decisions based on their assessment of other people’s facial features, posture, behavioral cues and personality traits. “What other people think of you really isn’t any of your business: it’s best to not let other people’s opinions prevent you from being the authentic version of yourself.” Are you being used? 12 signs to look out forĮxtensive studies by Susan T Fiske et al revealed that warmth and competence are the two fundamental dimensions used by people to perceive others, and the combinations of these result in generating emotions like admiration, envy, indifference etc.Finding your tribe – the 7 steps you need to take.7 signs your friend doesn't care about you.Thus, we learned to interpret, label, and file our assessments about others, so we can retrieve and utilize the information when needed. Detecting danger and making quick decisions was deemed essential for reproduction, survival and evolution. The ability to infer the intentions of others from something as basic as motion cues alone is one of the basic cognitive adaptations deeply rooted in human behavior. And, although I understood the logic underlying the lesson “what other people think of me is none of my business”, the difficult part was to internalize the message and implement it consciously in day-to-day functioning. Tell yourself: “what other people think of me is none of my business.”Īs a compulsive people-pleaser, I used to worry about what people thought of me constantly, only to realize eventually that I could not possibly be liked by every single person. The fear of people’s opinions is an unreasonable obsession, especially predominant in the modern world, and what’s worse, it may be holding you back from performing at your best level.
The constant judgement and prying also creates a perceived need for people to seem ideal and likeable, which can often leave them struggling to cope with uncertainty regarding feedback from others. Social media implores us to constantly upload snippets of our lives: to be witnessed, judged, interpreted, and opined about in a myriad of ways and by people that we’ve often never even met! It seems like the more we reveal about ourselves, the more people have to say about us. Our relentless fixation with how others perceive us is further intensified in the online world. And, surprisingly, this tendency continues even after we get to know others relatively better. While the age-old idiom urges that it isn’t fair or wise to ‘judge a book by its cover’, humans are inherently programmed to do just that. Sonia Vadlamani explains why what other people think of you is really none of your business, and how imbibing this revolutionary truth can change your outlook on life, for the better.
0 kommentar(er)
